Father’s day lessons from our heavenly Father

Jun 17, 2015

By Mike Nelson
Scripture tells us very little about St. Joseph, the patron saint of fathers (and of much more, including the universal Church), but Scripture certainly shows us a model of a good father.

That discussion generally begins with the prodigal son, and his father’s forgiveness, often cited as perhaps the best example of what being a loving father is all about. I won’t argue that point, but the biblical passage I most connect with, as a father, and as a son, comes from the book of the prophet Ezekiel.

In Chapter 36, God speaks (through Ezekiel) to his people, just as many real-life dads speak to their children. In this case, after they have acted up yet again.

Not only is God not pleased; God seems more than ready to give his earthly children what they have asked.

“When the house of Israel lived in its land,” said the Lord, “they defiled it with their behaviour and their deeds. ... When they came to the nations where they went, they desecrated my holy name.”

But then, God’s tone changes, as if talking himself down from his anger — just as my dad used to do when I had “acted up” for the umpteenth time, and he had let forth his umpteenth rant upon my chastened ears. Not that God is letting his children off the hook. “

Not for your sakes do I act, house of Israel,” said God, “but for the sake of my holy name, which you desecrated among the nations to which you came.”

Then — again, as my dad would do — God makes clear how much he loves his children, promising to “bring you back to your own soil,” to “sprinkle clean water over you to make you clean from all your impurities.”

Finally, in his most loving, fatherly tone, God pledges to place “a new heart and a new spirit” within his children. “You will be my people,” he says, “and I will be your God.”

In 35 years as a dad, and 62 as a son, I have yet to see a more compelling job description for a father than the one Ezekiel shares with us: No, children, you cannot do as you please, and I will step in when I see you stepping out of line, but I am going to be here with you, and help you, and love you always, because I am your father.

And that is what loving fathers do. They offer their children the security of unconditional love that is everything to a child, no matter how old he or she is. Jesus certainly felt that with his divine Father, but we can be equally certain that he felt it with his earthly father Joseph.

Earlier this year, Pope Francis spoke on what being a good father is all about. It is not about being a control freak or “a softie,” the Pope stressed, but about patience.

“Fathers must be patient,” said Pope Francis. “So many times, there’s nothing left to do but wait, pray and wait with patience, tenderness, magnanimity and mercy.”

I have been blessed with a father who understands this, even when he wonders (sometimes in no uncertain terms) about my choices in life. I have tried to be that kind of a father — patient, tender, generous, merciful — with my son, who has been much less trying of my patience than I was of my father’s.

I must add that, like Joseph, I am blessed to have a wife who exemplifies unconditional love and generosity in the care and raising of our son. That, too, is a lesson for all fathers, and all children — a lesson that we need not rely on Scripture to tell us.