Godparents: Strengthening the family tent

Jul 19, 2024

Canvas - Fr Richard Anthonysamy, SJ
“Are you ready to help the parents of this child in their duty as Christian parents?” In the Rite of Baptism, one of the first questions asked is directed to the godparents. Infant baptisms take place monthly in most parishes. The Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults (RCIA) will begin in the coming weeks. Some may have already begun. Baptisms are occasions of joy and blessing for the Church. The Lord continues to add to our number. It is a comforting and hopeful sign of the Lord’s continual trust and faith in His Church on earth despite its shortcomings. An important person in the baptism of a child or adult is the godparent. The title “god-parent” is a directional one.

Readiness
The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC #1253-1255) speaks about the godparents representing the community of believers who help in the faith development of the newly the baptised. Readiness is seen first in the person of the godparent. Paragraph 1255 of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) states, “For the grace of baptism to unfold, the parents’ help is important. So too is the role of the godfather and godmother, who must be firm believers, able and ready to help the newly baptised — child or adult — on the road of Christian life. Their task is a truly ecclesial function (officium).”

The one who wants to accepts the responsibilities of a godparent must “be a Catholic who has been confirmed (Sacrament of Confirmation) and has received the blessed Eucharist, and who lives a life of faith which befits the role to be undertaken” (Canon Law 874 subsection 1.3). In summary, godparents are to be those who truly believe in the Christian faith and strive to live a life of faithfulness to Christ. They are those who abide by the precepts of the Church. As the Catechism states, “Their task is a truly ecclesial function (officium).” At this juncture, it may help those who are currently godparents and those considering this path of sharing the faith, to pause and reflect because all the baptized are called to grow in faith. The CCC (#1254) states, “For all the baptised, children and adults, faith must grow after baptism.” Baptism is not the endpoint, but a beginning of a life of faith and faithfulness in Christ for all. Hence, readiness is not only pre-existing suitability as per the catechism and precepts above, but the attitude of ongoing learning and growth.

Christian parenting
One wonders how many of us godparents see our godparenting responsibility beyond helping to hold the towel or baptismal candle at the Rite of Baptism. A random informal survey of several Christian faithful at various churches, BECs, church gatherings, etc., about the role and purpose of the godparent revealed interesting responses.

It was a joy to hear some make every effort to stay in touch with the parents and their godchild. A few remarked, “…the day I became a godparent, I too felt “baptised” into a new role as a Christian. I also became an extended parent. Part of me felt moved to take my response to God more seriously.” Others added, “now that I may have to answer my godchild’s questions, I better starting reading up, as well as pay attention in church!!” Another remarked, “Why did God chose me for this task? There must a reason… there’s something I have to fulfil…” and, “I am in the church choir, so I am going to sing hymns to my godchild whenever possible.” Truly, being chosen to become a godparent is like a “second baptism.” One elderly couple remarked, “Being a godparent even before we become parents ourselves gave us a chance to prepare. We found time to meet our godchild. We took the initiative. And when we finally had our own children, we made sure our children and godchild met each other regularly. They have a friendship now.”

The other side of the coin reveals some worrisome responses. Some said, “I live too far away from my godchild to help in any way. I live overseas.” Another remarked, “I don’t know why they asked me. I don’t really go to church regularly. Maybe because I am family.” One said, “I don’t know what is expected of me, really. I was called for a short training on godparenting that didn’t last even an hour. So, I guess it’s not that big a deal for the Church.” Yet another said, “It’s only for the ritual, the family said, so I said okay.”

When asked about what help the parents are hoping for from their children’s godparents, some remarked, “Not much as they have their own lives, and we have ours.” Another said, “I hope they help me, especially with Church stuff as I am not knowledgeable on those things. I am a convert.” One couple said, “It would be nice if once in a month or two, they dropped by for a meal and developed a friendship with their godchild.” Two persons said, “My child’s godparents live overseas. They just came back for the baptism, and then they left. So, we don’t expect anything.”

Listening to the above comments, both positives and negatives, one wonders how we, as Church, should re-think being and becoming godparents. We know what the expectations of the Church are. We know the purpose of godparents in the life of the newly baptised. My professor of theology used to say, “There are some things we get to correct and change, if we pause, take a step back, and make some prayerful decisions.” Maybe we should do this with, and for, godparents. Perhaps we need a ministry for godparents, or preparing them.

Some years ago, someone sent me this prayer. The source was not provided. But to the person(s) who composed it, we give full credit. God of light and love, thank you for the joy of being a godparent,

And the opportunities it gives us to journey
with our godchildren as they grow in faith.
Keep us faithful to the promises we have made
to pray for them,
and to encourage them to deepen their
relationship with You.
Help us to be a prayerful, supportive
and loving presence in the lives of our
godchildren,
And to model to them a life rooted in You, the
way, the truth and the life.
Amen.

(Fr Richard Anthonysamy SJ is involved in parish ministry, spiritual direction, and faith formation work.)