Praying or saying prayers

Aug 30, 2024

Reminiscing Church - Richard Chia
Have you noticed how we Catholics automatically stand when the celebrant says, 'Let us pray'? This action comes naturally, ingrained in us through years, even decades, of faithfully attending Mass each week and on Holy Days of Obligation.

From a young age, we’re taught the various postures for prayer — how to stand, kneel, clasp our hands, and what to say, when we pray. Catechists continue to impart these traditions to both children and adults, and rightly so.
Today, countless examples of ready-made prayers are available for download, ready to be copy-pasted and adapted for any specific intention or event. These complement the many set prayers we recite during the Novena, Rosary, and various devotions dedicated to the Saints and Mother Mary.

Despite all the sources of prayer, I notice that many Catholics are not comfortable praying spontaneously. When called upon to say grace before meals, do an opening or closing prayer, they quickly decline, or hesitate. Of course I am generalising here, as I also know of many who will quickly jump in to say prayers effortlessly.

Accusations that Catholics don’t know how to pray or can’t quote scripture have been hurled at the laity since time immemorial. The truth of these claims often depends on our upbringing, involvement in the Church, and how we live out our faith each day.

For those who attended catechism from a young age, our first exposure to prayer will certainly be the Lord’s Prayer, Hail Mary, Glory Be, and making the Sign of the Cross. Catechists teach these as foundational to prayer. Alongside these prayers, we learn to clasp our hands, perhaps close our eyes, tilt our heads downward, and recite these prayers by heart. For those who struggle, repetition is encouraged until they can do so confidently.

As we grow, we learn to recite the five decades of the Rosary and the Apostles’ Creed. For those who pray regularly, incorporating the four Mysteries of the Rosary into daily prayer, along with the Memorare, the Magnificat, and the Prayer for the Sick during the Novena to Our Lady of Perpetual Help, becomes a vital part of our spiritual life.

For prayer before meals, there is that universal Bless Us O Lord.... prayer. For the devout, our late Holy Father Pope Benedict XVI encouraged the lay faithful to pray the Divine Office Liturgy of the Hours daily. The Catholic Church is never short of prayers – for every occasion, every event and every day of our life.

So how is it that with all these wealth of prayers available, many Catholics are still incapable of praying spontaneously when called upon to do so? The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) teaches that “prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy” (CCC #2558). St Therese of Lisieux’s autobiography manuscripts says “Prayer is the raising of one's mind and heart to God or the requesting of good things from God”.

The CCC also tells us there are six forms of prayer. A prayer of blessing is our human response to God’s gift, because God blesses us, and in return we bless the One who is the source of every blessing. A prayer of adoration is not only done during Holy Hour in Church, or on Holy Thursday, but can be done privately in respectful silence in the presence of God.

The prayer of petition is one we pray often. Asking God to hear our prayers and to grant us our petitions. Prayer of intercessions are usually prayers we pray for others – our family, friends, society, people we know, etc. Prayer of thanksgiving and prayer of praise are some of the common prayers Catholics pray often, especially at group gatherings, novenas and formal prayer sessions.

Reciting prayers are the hallmark of many Catholics schooled in the way of Catholic prayers. But, are we really praying? What exactly is prayer?

Without delving in deep theological definitions of prayer, my answer is simply “Prayer is like falling in love and communicating with God”. As an analogy, when a couple first fall in love, there is tendency for them to want to be together, to meet, talk and be with each other. Today, this could be via whatsapp video, chat or messaging. The need to be constantly in touch, hearing the other’s voice and words, and exchanging sweet nothings. That is early stages of love.

As this love deepens, it transforms into a commitment, and the decision to be together for life. The topic of conversation changes. Less lovey-dovey communication. More serious conversation about future, adjustments required and what needs to be done.

Decades later, this love matures and there is less communication. Love is no longer expressed in words, but in presence. Being together, doing things together and sharing experiences together becomes the norm. At this stage, words become less, not that there is nothing to say, but because they already know each other intimately, and know each other’s feelings and thoughts.

Prayer is like falling in love with God. For those new to prayer, there is a tendency to talk more. We spend most of our time saying prayers, reciting prayers, reading from prayer books. As we mature in our prayer life, saying or reciting prayers become secondary, replaced by spending time in prayer with God. Being in His presence, in silent contemplation becomes our expression of love.

Whichever way we pray, remember that prayer is personal time with God. It is our intimate moment with Him, face-to-face in direct communication with the Almighty. He does not need our words to know our innermost thoughts and feelings. All He wants from you is YOU.

(Richard Chia shares his experiences on the journey of the Church in Malaysia in the past forty years. Its challenges and achievements as it moves toward synodality.)