Scars to my beautiful...

Nov 22, 2024

A Blessed Life- Tianne Ramona Pereira

I am not one to usually stand and look at myself in the mirror, but on the rare occasion that I do, I sigh heavily at the sight of my scar and the rolls my C-section have created on my body. However, very recently, I went for a massage and when the masseur turned me over, a sense of pride trickled upon me as I exposed this unsightly mark. It was at that moment I realised that this blemish on my body was not just a mark on my skin, but a map of strength and resilience. In that momentarily eureka moment, it dawned upon me that this was a physical reminder of a moment when my body did the most incredible thing — it brought life into the world.

The idea of a permanent mark may seem strange and, at times, unsettling, but this was about to change as I went on to scrutinise all my other physical scars and flaws.

When I was about five years old, I was adventurous, curious and mischievous, I remember climbing up the window glass panes at home only to come crashing down. I was left with a huge gash on my feet that had to have 15 or 18 stitches. I remember my mother running with me in her arms to get me attended to. All this while I hated the scar on my left foot that often leaves people thinking I have a lizard on it, but now, I look at this scar as a bodily reminder of my mother, her commitment to protecting me and her love.

I then started recalling other marks, some from fighting with my sisters, playing basketball, falling off my bicycle, the mark on my finger from almost losing my life by electrocution and began to see these not as a flaws, but as a testament to my journey — one that is and was, filled with challenges, triumphs, fun and a depth of love I never consciously grasped. It also reminded me of God’s infinite presence, mercy, and protection.

As with all “defects” there is the sting of vulnerability, the lingering sense that something about my body had been altered, irrevocably. I always imagined and hoped for that perfect body that was flawless and something to be strived for. But with age I am starting to realise that scars are just as beautiful, and each carries its own story. It serves as a symbol of a journey we take and the person we become because of it.

The most prominent example of scars in our faith are the wounds of Jesus, especially those on His hands, feet, and side. After His resurrection, Jesus appeared to His disciples and showed them His scars, even inviting Thomas to touch them. These scars served as proof of His identity, His sacrifice, and His victory over death.

This idea is so simple yet so significant when understood. It’s an idea that I always knew theoretically, but never really gripped onto the depth of it.

Scars, in all their varied forms, are not weaknesses, but rather, ciphers of survival. Every scar on my body tells a story of resilience. My C-section scar is now a mark of strength, proof that my body had done what seemed to be impossible. It had nurtured, protected, and finally, with quiet determination, brought life into the world. And it is not just the outcome that matters, it is the process, the struggle, and the courage that saw me through. As I learn to embrace this scar, and the other scars I carry — both visible and hidden, some physical and some emotional, some healed and some healing, I know that as painful as some may be, none of these scars are mistakes.

I write this for anyone who needs to hear it, our scars are powerful in the way they hold stories of endurance. If you are going through something now, or are holding on to a wound, know that it will pass and it will heal. Psalm 147:3 says, “He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds,” emphasising that God can heal both our physical and emotional wounds. You will be able to look back one day and speak of battles fought — some of which are won, others that leave lasting marks. Know that our scars empower us. They remind us that we are capable of withstanding more than we ever thought possible. They remind us that we are not defined by the things that have hurt us, but by how we rise above them.

In our journey of becoming more Christlike, I guess our struggles and crosses are part of God’s work in moulding us. Just as scars may mark a healed wound, our trials leave us stronger, more compassionate, and closer to God.

What is truly remarkable about scars is that they do not only mark the past; they illuminate our future. They stand as silent witnesses to our growth, as proof that we have evolved from each experience, each moment of pain, into something stronger, wiser, and more compassionate. There is power in that. There is power in knowing that I am not the sum of my struggles, but the sum of my ability to rise above them. And it is through experience we can relate to and uplift someone who is struggling.

And so, as of a few weeks ago, I have come to love my scars, my wrinkles, my fine lines and every other imperfection that is ever so evident now. I wouldn’t call them flaws anymore, nor is it something to be hidden away, it is a part of my story, one chapter in a much larger narrative of strength, transformation, and empowerment.

If we can learn to see our scars as marks of empowerment, we unlock a deeper understanding of ourselves — marks of grace and redemption. We begin to realise that we are not unscathed, untouched, pristine — we are warriors, healers, survivors, and in that realisation, we find our greatest strength. May every scar be a reminder that we are living, growing, and evolving, always moving forward, one beautiful, imperfect mark at a time.

(Tianne Ramona Pereira identifies first as a Catholic daughter, sister, wife and mother. From years in the media industry, she eventually started and continues to run her own businesses while teaching part-time. She has been actively serving in church for as far back as she can remember and is involved in various charities.)