Seek the unfamiliar

Sep 06, 2024

Word in Progress - Karen-Michaela Tan
There’s a comfortable acceptance that comes with nearly turning 50. My friends in the same boat share my sentiments about loving the freedom that age brings, because lived wisdom has shown us its not how much we weigh, or the dress size we wear that matters, as much as the experiences we have lived through.

However, with age also comes a certain complacency, and a greater adherence to routine and familiarity. I would rather go to a tried and true café than traipse across town to some undoubtedly overpublicised restaurant where the crowds almost assure a slower, substandard dining experience.

I have been such a stickler for the safety of routine these past few years that I have tried my hardest to plan trips and vacations so they would see me home by either Saturday or Sunday in order for me to particpate at Mass at either of the two parishes most familiar to me. I kid you not, I would rather take the red eye flight overnight and arrive at KLIA at 3.00am and make my way to 6.45am Mass on Sunday at my Petaling Jaya parish rather than be caught in a different state or country when I’d be forced to seek out the nearest church and try to align Mass times with my travel itinerary.

This is a fairly new thing with me. Prior to this, I loved experiencing Masses in the language of the nation I was in. I have heard Mass in Russian in a monastery, celebrated it with a group of Greek neophytes newly received into the Catholic church in Santorini, heard the kyrie in strongly accented Australian, and the Our Father in Afrikaans, as well as been present at Masses in Vietnamese, Thai and Indonesian. Each of these experiences underscored the universality of the Catholic church. No matter the language, I knew exactly which part of the Mass I was at, and knew when to bow, genuflect or kneel. That feeling of always being ‘home’ no matter what language Mass was in is something that I loved.

So what has changed, to the point that even a different presider at my parish makes me squirm? Much of it comes from the need for familiarity as I age. I see it in my 82-year-old father too, the disgruntled face he pulls when the choir suddenly decides to incorporate electric guitars and drums, or when the time for daily Mass changes.

This demand for things to never change is kind of Catholic. After all, Hebrews 13:8 says it quite plainly, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, and today, and forever.” Somehow this idea that Jesus Christ is exactly the same in the past, in the present, and in the future has spilled into the way we want our Church to be. We grumble when Malay hymns are introduced into the order of Mass, we shuffle when made to sing Agnus Dei instead of Lamb of God, and we took a long time to get into the habit of responding “And with your spirit” instead of “and also with you” when our priests say “Peace be with you.”

There is a very real danger of stagnation when our faith is built on such doggedness. Our desire for uniformity and sameness can make us blind to things that need to change, both in liturgy and in the parts we play in our way of being Church. In these days of such flux, the Church is challenged when it is called to be a constant in a world of shifting views and opinions. However, we must never forget that when Jesus began his public ministry, He was regarded as an upstart and renegade simply because He broke the mould of a preacher. He did not scorn non-Jews, He ate with the supposed enemies of the Jewish people, and consorted with women of dubious repute. And yet, this rabbi with a difference was to bring back the lost tribes of Israel, and add to their numbers millions of people from different tribes and tongues.

This is why it is important for every Catholic to catch ourselves when we feel we are too mired in the usual, the average, and the mundane. While it is not wrong to like regularity and routine, it is wrong if we make gods out of our need for constant consistency. Upon reaching a certain age, many Catholics feel it is their right to want things to remain a certain way.

We forget that Jesus in Matthew 10:34- 36 said, “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth; I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-inlaw; and one’s foes will be members of one’s own household.” While this seems antithetical to Jesus’ message and ministry, we must realise that all four Gospels contain the message that following Jesus is no easy path. Following a trailblazer didn’t mean that the men and women who came after Jesus were not picking stones out of their sandals.

The deeper truth behind this passage is the fact that choices have consequences. When we hold on to how we believe things should be, we are blind to how things can be made better or are being made better. Unshakeable persistence to the ‘old way of doing things’ shut us out from the graces, knowledge and learning that come with new experiences. If Sarah could bear a child at 90, how much more can we be enriched with new experiences and wisdom if we go out of our way to challenge our comfort zones?

Perhaps it is time for us to look at our lives and call our obstinate clinging to routine by its real name: cowardice. When we shrink our world to suit our level of risk, we also close ourselves to growth. No matter our ages, we need to remember that God calls all His people to push out into deeper water (Luke 5:4) because there is where the bounty is.

(Karen-Michaela Tan is a poet, writer and editor who seeks out God’s presence in the human condition and looks for ways to put the Word of God into real action.)