The woman at the well

Like the Samaritan woman, Jesus touched me in the most painful place — in a young girl losing her mother, but He did it with tenderness and compassion. He got me ready. There in my most profound brokenness, I found and experienced God.

Mar 25, 2024


A Blessed Life- Tianne Ramona Pereira
“Like the woman at the well I was seeking, for things that could not satisfy, and then I heard my Saviour speaking, draw from My well that never shall run dry” ? Only recently did I pay attention to how deep and meaningful these words really are, when I realised that was me! I was the woman at the well! Lost, broken, ashamed and hurt.

It all began about 20 years ago; I was a young girl who suddenly felt unusually “holy”. I found myself very often drawn into prayer. Don’t get me wrong, I prayed — but there was something different this time.

Like it was yesterday, I remember a gloomy December morning, just as the sun was about to rise, my dad had just driven into the driveway and an overwhelming sense of relief came upon me, since I had been up all night waiting for my parents to get home from the hospital. But in an instant my relief turned into palpitations when I realised my dad was alone — he pushed the door open, sobbing and repeating the words “mummy’s dying”. It was that dreadful morning we found out my mom’s cancer was back. I could feel my knees trembling, I felt my heart sink so low it left a numbing hollowness in my chest, but for some reason, I had no tears and I found myself in front of our altar on my knees.
Over the next few months, I prayed harder than I have ever prayed before and God spoke to me. Yes! He did. His message was crystal clear and I knew a miracle was in store. No one could say anything that could shake my belief. Even after my mother slipped into a coma, even when the doctors told us mummy had a few days to live, even when we were asked to take her home so she could pass in the comfort of her own home — I did not care, because I knew my mom was going to be healed. God Himself told me! In my head, hundreds of people were going to be left in awe because God was going to work His miracle through my mother.

Fast forward to March 10, 2006, at almost 3.00pm, my mom’s older sister arrived from abroad. As soon as she came into the bedroom, the entire family gathered around my mom and we began to recite the Divine Mercy prayer. As my Mama (maternal grandmother) recited the last words of the prayer, I saw tears roll down my mom’s cheeks, she lifted her left hand as if reaching for something, laid it down gently on her chest as she took in a deep last breath. Now you must know my mummy’s left arm was limp due to an earlier surgery and for many years she was unable to use or even lift her arm. At that moment, the promise of Divine Mercy ran through my mind — Jesus Himself came to take her soul up to heaven.

Throughout my mom’s funeral I was sad but strong. I had an impenetrable inner strength, I was calm and composed. A few months later however, I found myself questioning a lot of things — mostly I questioned God. I questioned His existence. How could He be real? He told me mummy was going to be fine and now she was gone. I was convinced now that I had been fooled and bought into the fantasy of a God. I got up one morning to pray and realised I had no reason to, no one was listening and now that my mummy was gone, I had nothing to pray for. That was when I stopped praying and, very soon after, I stopped believing.

I was still socially active in Church, I would still attend Mass. My dad made sure my sisters and I attended Mass faithfully every Sunday, and today I see that as one of the greatest blessings. He didn’t know what I was going through, no one did. At Mass I would follow the “rituals” but my mind would wander far off — it travelled into books I read, into what I was going to have for breakfast later, I would inspect the details of what the lady in front of me was wearing and when Mass was finally over, I would get up, cross myself, walk out of church and, with profound blankness in my heart, wish everyone a joyful “peace be with you”. The hypocrisy! No one knew that this girl who advised her peers about prayer life and God, in actuality didn’t believe He was real.

I had become that world-thirsty woman sitting by the well. I sat there for almost three years. Then one day, I “overheard” the homily that was going on about how we miss to see the everyday miracles and how our ways are not God’s ways. Although I thought I had blocked my mind from every and anything to do with God, I found myself becoming attentive to every word shared. Week after week it became a challenge for me to not listen. Slowly but surely, I began to realise all those times GOD DID SPEAK TO ME — but I DIDN’T UNDERSTAND. He told me mummy was going to be alright, and now she was more than alright. He said mummy would be healed, and now she is. He told me mummy would not suffer and she is now free from any pain. Every single prayer I prayed was answered. Not the way I pictured it, but the way it was truly meant to be. While I miss my mummy tremendously, I have come to understand that death is inevitable and my mom’s death was as beautiful as her life. If I could turn back time, I wouldn’t change a thing. In fact, I hope when my time comes, I would be as prepared as she was.

I see now how Jesus equipped me for one of the greatest losses I would face. The strength I had to deal with this loss was not my own, but divine. I was strong because He made me strong. Like St Paul wrote, “God works for the good of those who love Him” (Romans 8:28). I am still on my spiritual journey — I am not done, but I do know when I look back, I’m far from where I used to be.

Like the Samaritan woman, Jesus touched me in the most painful place — in a young girl losing her mother, but He did it with tenderness and compassion. He got me ready. There in my most profound brokenness, I found and experienced God. It was not through a sensational miracle, but in the small and astonishingly beautiful details that I felt my thirst quenched.

I share my experience for anyone who needs to hear it, when things don’t go your way, don’t give up on God. Hold on and hold tight because, more often than not, we do not see the whole picture. Lift up your cup and remember, some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers!

(Tianne Ramona Pereira identifies first as a Catholic daughter, sister, wife and mother. From years in the media industry, she eventually started and continues to run her own businesses while teaching part-time. She has been actively serving in church for as far back as she can remember and is involved in various charities.)

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