What I demand for Christmas

Dec 01, 2024

Word Made Fresh - Nicholas Lye

When I realised that I would not be in time for the weekday Mass, even though I was already on my way to church, I felt invited by the Lord to have an early dinner instead.

As I sat down at my favourite chicken rice stall, and given that I had more than an hour to spare before the start of the workshop I was running that evening, I felt led to take my time to quietly enjoy my meal. This eventually reminded me of my time during a silent retreat, where we learnt as retreatants to slow down and take our time to be present to God by being present to what we were eating. It was therefore in this moment of enjoying my meal and being present to everything that was happening around me, including the people who were walking past me or talking beside me, that I suddenly and deeply felt the strong presence of God.

“If it were easy to live in the now, everyone would do it… What you must learn in order to be not dead but alive – in this moment – is to drop your demands… That is our basic problem… We are not willing to accept what simply is.” (From Losing Your Faith, Finding Your Soul, David Anderson)

It would have been easy for me to get upset with myself for not making it in time for Mass, to blame the traffic on the road that prolonged the travel time and caused the delay, or to let this event of not making it for Mass ruin the rest of the day for me.

Instead, I chose to drop the demand for the roads to be clear for my sake, the demand for everything to go according to my plan for my benefit, and even the demand to go for Mass every day, even though it is encouraged and good for me. In place of my demands, I chose to accept the situation simply for what it was and embrace the given moment to do what I still have control over and what I felt led by the Lord to do, which was to slow down and savour my meal and my surroundings in the holy presence of God.

“The only way to stay alive is to embrace the world – the whole thing, in all its contradictions and benedictions… consciously (deciding) that today, right now, I will love what is… Your only salvation in this moment is to admit that you cannot change the world, that the one who needs to be changed is you.” (From Losing Your Faith, Finding Your Soul, David Anderson)

As I reflect on Mary and Joseph in this season of Advent, I believe that they too learnt to drop their demands and desires amidst the confusion and controversy of Mary’s virgin birth, and simply accept all that the Lord had planned and desired for them. Mary could not control what the people in her village might think of her. Joseph could not change the decree for a census to be conducted, which ‘forced’ them to leave Nazareth to go to Bethlehem. Neither could Mary and Joseph change the fact that there was no other room to have their child apart from a dirty, smelly stable.

Still, they chose to embrace the world as it was, with all the challenging things, along with all the blessings that still came their way in terms of God’s providence and grace at work in their lives. By allowing themselves to be changed according to God’s will and plan for them, and dropping their demands based on their limited understanding of what was best for them, it was through Mary’s visit that Elizabeth encountered the strong presence of God; it was in a worn-out stable that Mary, Joseph and all the shepherds and wise men could experience the real presence of God in their midst.

“When you drop your demands for a better world than God created, you realise that you don’t have to fix yourself and all those other faulty people… The people who are best prepared to change the world are those who have confronted their egos and no longer need to impose them on the world. These are finally the people who can cooperate with the Creator and Sustainer of it all, who can truly change the world because they have allowed themselves to be changed… When we learn to accept things as they are, we are freed from the need to be the saviour of the world and can humbly allow God to work through us.” (From ‘Losing Your Faith, Finding Your Soul’, David Anderson)

I too have been learning to drop my demands on situations around me, and on the people who sometimes hurt me or annoy me. I have been learning to be more present in God’s presence amid circumstances that at first seem unlikely to reveal His presence. And the more I embrace people and the situation for what it is, and allow God to work in and through me, I begin to experience the birth of Christ in every unexpected, unwelcomed, untidy place and situation in my life and the world.

I pray that in this season of Advent, you may learn not to demand gifts from the Lord according to your plans and desires. Rather, may we learn to better drop our demands, embrace the world for what it is just as Christ does, so that we can be more open to letting God gift us with His true presence even in the most unlikely of situations, places and people. For when that truly happens, it is ultimately what God wants for us this Christmas.

(Nicholas Lye is a lay missionary and creative evangelist who loves to use creativity and various art forms to share the faith and help people encounter God’s truths in a fun and meaningful way)