Why confession matters more than you think

Mar 14, 2025

By Thomson Emmanuel Wong
Confession is one of the seven sacraments of the Catholic Church, a sacred encounter where God’s mercy meets our human frailty. Yet for many, Confession feels daunting, unnecessary, or even outdated.

When was the last time you went to confession? Perhaps you’ve thought about it but stopped short, unsure if it’s truly necessary. Or maybe you’ve dismissed it entirely, thinking, “I don’t have anything serious to confess,” or “Does it really make a difference?”

But Confession isn’t just a rule or a tradition. It’s transformative. It’s the key to peace, freedom, and a renewed relationship with God. And for many of us, its importance is something we tend to underestimate. If you’ve ever felt restless or distant from God, could Confession be the step you’ve been avoiding?

The Hidden Weight of Guilt
We often carry guilt without realising how much it affects us. It might creep into our thoughts, weigh on our hearts, or even strain our relationships.

Take this example: imagine you’ve hurt someone close to you. You feel guilty but never take the step to apologise. Over time, the guilt creates distance, making every interaction with them feel strained. Confession works similarly. Guilt, when left unaddressed, quietly creates a barrier between us and God.

Many people avoid Confession because they think they haven’t done anything “big” enough to confess or believe they have no sins at all. But sin isn’t always dramatic — it can be found in the smaller ways we fail to love, whether through impatience, pride, or neglecting others in need. Confession helps us see these faults clearly and gives us the grace to grow.

Confession isn’t about dwelling on guilt. It’s about letting it go. It’s about finally saying, “I’m sorry,” and hearing God respond, “You are forgiven.”

Why Confess to a Priest?
One of the most frequent questions about Confession is, “Why do I need to confess to a priest? Can’t I just go directly to God?”

While it’s true that we can and should pray directly to God for forgiveness, Confession offers something more.

Through the sacrament, the priest acts in persona Christi — in the person of Christ — extending God’s mercy in a tangible and personal way.

Many people worry, “What if the priest remembers my sins later?” or even, “What if he judges me?” Priests are bound by the seal of Confession, which requires absolute confidentiality. They cannot, under any circumstances, reveal or act on what they hear in confession.

Confessing to a priest can sometimes feel intimidating, but remember that the priest isn’t there to judge you. He’s there to guide you, to help you uncover the areas of your life where God’s grace can work most powerfully. Even if you feel unsure or forget the steps, don’t let that hold you back. Just be honest, and the priest will gently guide you through the process. The focus is not on perfection but on taking the step towards reconciliation and healing.

Ultimately, Confession reminds us that forgiveness isn’t just an internal experience. It’s an encounter with God, mediated through the Church He established. Hearing the priest say, “I absolve you of your sins,” is a powerful assurance of God’s forgiveness — a reassurance we all need.

The Courage to Be Honest
Honesty in Confession isn’t easy. It means admitting where we’ve fallen short and acknowledging our need for God’s mercy. But that honesty is also deeply healing.

When was the last time you were completely honest — with yourself, with God, or with anyone? Confession is a moment of raw vulnerability, and in that moment, God meets us not with judgment, but with love.

Think of confession as a spiritual mirror. It’s not about listing sins for the sake of it. It’s about seeing yourself clearly and understanding how much you need God’s grace. It’s not weakness to admit that we fall short. It’s courage.

Confession and Its Impact on Relationships Sin doesn’t just affect your relationship with God. It impacts how you relate to others. It can make you irritable, impatient, or withdrawn.

Think about the last time you carried guilt for something you said or did. Did it make it harder to connect with the people around you? Did it affect how you treated them? Confession doesn’t just heal your soul. It helps you show up better for the people in your life. I remember hearing someone share how confessing a grudge they’d been holding freed them to truly forgive a family member. That forgiveness transformed their relationship.

By letting go of guilt and receiving God’s mercy, you’re freed to love others more fully.

Breaking the Cycle of Sin
Sin often works like a bad habit. At first, it’s just a one-off action — a harsh word, a selfish choice. But over time, it becomes easier to repeat until it feels normal.

Confession breaks that cycle. It’s a wakeup call, a chance to recognise where you’ve gone off track and choose a better path. It’s not about punishment. It’s about freedom.

Confession also reminds us of something profound: we’re not self-sufficient. We need God’s grace to grow and thrive. Asking for His help isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s an act of strength.

Confession Isn’t About Shame — It’s About Healing
For many people, the hardest part of confession is the fear of shame. But confession isn’t about reliving your mistakes. It’s about leaving them behind.

For me, walking out of the confessional is like slamming the door on the devil and declaring, “You don’t own me. I belong to God.” It’s a reminder of the victory that confession brings — not just forgiveness but true freedom.

The Freedom of Confession
Confession matters more than you think because it’s not just about the past. It’s about the future. It’s about receiving God’s mercy and finding the strength to move forward.

If you’ve been avoiding Confession, ask yourself: “What’s holding me back?” Fear? Doubt? Pride? Whatever it is, God isn’t waiting to condemn you. He’s waiting to welcome you back with open arms.

Thank God for giving us this sacrament — a gift that allows us to encounter His mercy in a tangible way. God is love, and His love for us never falters, even when we fall short. While sin separates us from Him, His invitation to reconciliation is constant.

Confession reminds us that we don’t have to carry the burden of sin on our own. Through this sacrament, God offers His mercy and grace, freeing us from guilt and restoring us to His peace. By confessing our sins, we not only repair our relationship with God but also prepare our hearts to receive Him more fully in the Eucharist.

The peace that follows confession is unlike anything else. It’s the peace of being right with God, of being reminded that His love always has the final word. So take that step — because the victory of Confession is waiting for you.

(Thomson Emmanuel Wong, a parishioner of the Church of Our Lady of Lourdes, Klang, is someone who deeply appreciates the beauty and richness of the Catholic faith.)

(The views expressed are entirely the writer’s own.)